A Loving Union

  Saturday was my cousin Jessica's wedding reception, her and her now-husband Chris (they've been together 10-odd years and I love him) are finally hitched! Daniel escorted me as my hot date and I found it extremely pleasing that he looks so dashing in a suit - complete with suspenders, hubba hubba.
They had a nice video of the real wedding which took place in Punta Cana, a splendidly pleasant DJ named Christian, an actual Candy Bar, and of course at the end of the night - in true classy nature - the bride was a drunken mess who loved her life more than anything.
Daniel was a charming gentleman the entire night, we had an abundance of intimate laughs - most of which took place during his requested song Hello by Lionel Richie. There also happened to be a University Mathematics Graduation party going on next door, filled to the brim with orientals (not to be prejudice in the slightest, but I didn't see one white person) who all looked exceptionally fabulous in their party dresses and gowns. Naturally, Daniel peeked into their party, ran back over to grab me (while not wearing shoes) and dragged me onto their dance floor for a little bit of inebriated, obnoxious and explicit gyrating for less than a full song before sprinting to a table, grabbing a rose, handing it off to me and jetting back to our own party where the bartender was happily waiting.

There was a sandcastle

This is my Oma looking fabulous in her sparkle gown.

'Nuff said.

   On our way out we grabbed more candy, souvenir shot glasses, and the top of the wedding cake that nobody touched because they forgot to place out a knife. The ride home was used for telling terribly inappropriate jokes and upon apartment arrival we got cozy and silly with Photobooth:

How Terrible It Is, To Love Something Death Can Touch.

Hi, I miss you. I love you. Where are you? Why aren't you here? Do you miss me? I hope you're okay. I hope you're fantastic. I hope it didn't hurt. I hope it didn't hurt too much. Please smile at me one more time. Please. I hope you aren't in pain wherever you are. I wish you could talk. I wish I could feel you around me. I wish I could feel your embrace. Were you scared? Were you thankful? Do you feel regret? Do you feel cheated? Do you even feel? Do you know how much I love you? Did I ever tell you enough? I talk to you sometimes. You're beautiful. I wish you still existed. Hi, I miss you.

  I've been thinking about you consistently for the past hour or so, and then I got caught up in that concept. For as long - or as short, or as well, as I knew you was the result of the amount of time I spend thinking of you now that you're gone. I don't think about you every minute, every hour, or even every day. But I think about you. It comes and goes because time passes with each tick of the second hand and aches like the pulse behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls and I grit down and bear it.
Someone thinks about you every single day. Someone thinks about you multiple times every single day. How much time did they spend with you? How little time? How well did they know you? Should I be jealous that someone knew you better than I did if they consumed less of your presence? Should I be angry that I don't think about you more often? That's absurd.
I just want to turn the corner and feel my heart swell when I get to see your smile in flesh and colour. When I get to embrace you and stroke your wig-less boy hair and for a moment know that you are safe. And it wouldn't matter - all the questions, all the things I want to say but haven't been able to, all of the chances that were taken away for you to be a part of my life. I would be lost in the safety net.

  Hi Tamarra, I miss you.

Nothing Like Good Food, Good Wine and a Bad Girl.

  I've been in such a fluster I entirely forgot to show the delicious meal my lad made from scratch two-ish weeks ago (of course now I'm craving it, but I'm a sucker for any seafood).

Pan-seared Haddock covered in a white wine pan sauce with ham and pea soup, and a little bit of the wine in a glass.
Mmm.

Going crazy, need delicious substance.

I'm not very good with water-colour yet, I'm trying to figure out a technique but it's been a struggle.
Nonetheless! My baby David Bowie.

I just found this in my Photobooth folder and laughed hysterically.

Sometimes I'm such a mess.

Change Is Coming Around You

  My cousin (my 2nd cousin's wife, so - does that make her my step-2nd-cousin?) Christen is a beautiful folk/ballad singer, and she had a show tonight at The Little Bean Café. It just so happens to be a few blocks away from my house yet I had never been there before, it was quite large for a coffee shop but maintained that cozy and romantic vibe. However, it's been a bit of a chilly day so my aunt said she would pick me up since it wasn't out of her way and we immediately ran in for hot drinks (while making them 'Irish').
  We chatted with fellow friendly coffee-drinkers and grabbed a table to chit-chat with each other at. The opening girl began her set and I thought her voice was lovely (until Christen's set), but we grabbed some cards and played a few games of euchre while gabbing and enjoying the sounds flowing around the room.
  You can check out samples of her songs at http://www.christenzuch.com/music.htm

  Oh and decided that I need to get a job so the boy and I can go out more often because spending a few days in my apartment lead to the following atrocity:

Basically the epitome of our existence.

Gifted Rooter

 I went to the boy's house on Tuesday and came home Friday around noon because I was supposed to have an interview at 1, but it was unfortunately rescheduled last-minute. We spent a lot of time bumming around and watching stupendous films/documentaries and talking (he made me eggies in a basket for breakfast which was just lovely because he's a wonderful cook).  

Movie List!

 K-PAX with Kevin Spacey who I am so smitten by I should be embarrassed. This could be the best acting I've seen him do where he plays Prot (prote), a patient at an institution who says he's from the planet K-PAX.

Catfish is a documentary about a photographer living with his brother and friend who are filmmakers. They spend almost a year capturing his developing yet questionable internet friendship with a family who send him artwork.

Dear Zachary is a documentary about the life of the late murdered Andrew Bagby dedicated to his baby son Zachary whom he never met (I cried like a fool during this one).

Another Spacey gem to satisfy my needs. The Usual Suspects is the 1995 film about five crooks who randomly end up in the same police line-up.

I not only loved this film for the obvious reason that it was fantastically written, but because the boy was geeking and giggling the entire time which only made me laugh more. Paul Giamatti and Thomas Haden Church play two best friends going through a mid-life crisis filled with wine and a road trip.

On the way home my mum made two pit-stops to show me these amazing thrift stores that have somehow gone unnoticed despite that they are located mere minutes from my apartment. I felt like a child in a candy store rooting through every possible rack and spending so much time in change rooms while having the most lovely conversations with their sales ladies.

  I checked all the tags vigorously looking for original prices but I had to check websites for a lot of them in the end. The original prices overall came to a whopping $860 while I only paid $65.99 and of course I'm experiencing just how pleased I am with myself.

Sheer black blouse with detailing - Nougat London/Limited Edition - $300 $15 - found at Carousel Clothing 

Sheer black blouse with detailing - Nougat London/Limited Edition - $300 $15 - found at Carousel Clothing 

Sheer black blouse with detailing - Nougat London/Limited Edition - $300 $15 - found at Carousel Clothing 

White knit top - Spanner Imports - $65 $15 - found at Carousel Clothing

Fitted double-breasted black blazer - Pariscope - $85 $15 - found at Carousel Clothing

Fitted double-breasted black blazer - Pariscope - $85 $15 - found at Carousel Clothing

Black see-thru blouse - Cassis - $69 $8 - found at Carousel Clothing

Grey blouse - Ports1961 - $215 $4.99 - found at Thrift Shop

Creme/black striped T-shirt - Frazier Lawrence - $50 $5 - found at Carousel Clothing

Creme/black striped T-shirt - Frazier Lawrence - $50 $5 - found at Carousel Clothing

Creme/black striped T-shirt - Frazier Lawrence - $50 $5 - found at Carousel Clothing

Black sailor-inspired sweater - Franco Valeri - $76 $3 - found at Thirft Shop

Early Life Crisis

  I have been entirely too stressed as of lately. My anxiety has been tested, pushed to its limits and I'm both physically and emotionally exhausted from it. Not that I want to get too detailed - especially via internet - but my mum has been going through yet another stressful patch and I worry about her so intently. Nonetheless, I am weighing my current options:

- Go for my work interview.

- Work full-time for a month or so.

- Get a small one-bedroom apartment or find a roommate and get a nicely sized two-bedroom.

OR

- Stay living at home.

- Save money for school despite my education fund.

- Go insane.

  Alas! I have had a break-through with future plans for the time being, ignoring the fact that I change my goals on a fairly regular basis. However, my mum was a very high-esteemed hair dresser and she used to get so fed up with me wailing at her when I was young that she wasn't doing my hair the way I wanted that she taught me how to do it myself. So I've been teaching myself how to work with hair (after many failed practice runs on my own poor head) for about 8 years and it has become second nature to me. Now of course all of my friends and their friends and family come to me to get free hair cuts/dye jobs, and I wonder to myself, "Why am I not getting paid to do this?".
  As I am naturally one of the most indecisive people I know, I have not been able to simply look through school programs or take tests to see what I would be best at and say, "This is it! This is what I want to do," without considering a dozen other options at the same time. Of course this contributes to my anxiety where I feel my feet are nailed to the floor and I can't move in any direction without fear of regret. The conclusion I came to was this: I will go to aesthetics school, which is only about 9 months (my city has 3 of the best aesthetics schools in Canada), after which I could get a job in a salon doing both hair and make-up. Hopefully at that point I will have some sort of better idea as to what I want to take in university (right now I'm leaning toward international law but that could change in 5 years or 5 minutes) and be making money just in case the current funding I have isn't enough.
  This is a good plan right? This will be a trade I can have for the rest of my life, because who knows when or if things will ever get tough - I'll always have a back-up safety net.

Kate's prom make-up (it went so nicely with her dress but I'm lacking more photos!)

She was so insistent that the curls wouldn't hold with her thin, pin-straight hair.

Up-dooo

They held.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And here are some of the stupid things I did with my hair, but the really embarrassing ones are staying hidden.

BLEACHED2SHIT

THE BOY CUT

THE UNDERCUT

THE UNDERCUT - RACING STRIPES EDITION

THE TUCKED MULLET

Slopped

  Today I sent in an application to the modeling agency my mother went to in her youth because she's been bantering me about it for the past 2 years - we'll see how that goes.

  This is unfortunately just a quick update of a poorly slopped-together outfit, but I was asked for a bit of a tutorial on how to do an intense eye/cat-flick. I was silly and forgot to take step-by-step photos but so I hope my descriptions prove helpful!

black over-sized tank - Old Navy, asphalt high waisted skirt - Joe Fresh,
black hoop belt - Stolen from mama's closet, platform zipper shoes - Aldo

1. Prep your face however you like best, but keep it basic and even-toned.
2. Take your concealer and put it on an eyebrow brush/clean mascara brush and work it through.
3. I used concealer on my lips because they're naturally rosey and I only wanted my eyes to be the focus.
4. Use a pale cream or grey for the base colour of your eye going from lash line to just above your natural crease as well as your lower lash line.
5. Take a rounded shadow brush and use a few shades darker cream/grey to work into your crease for smooth transition.
6. Take a small shadow brush and slowly build from the outer corner of your lash line out and back in again to your crease - don't go as far in as step 5.
7. Take a thin angled brush and follow your lash line to create a sharper edge.
8. **Optional: Use the same brush to follow your lower lash line 1/2-3/4 of the way in.
9. **Optional: Use the same brush again to follow the outer corner of your lower lash line and create a V shape the same length as step 8.
10. If necessary, use a liquid liner/whatever preference you have and sharpen the bold lines then add your mascara!

**Sidenote: you can stop at step 7 and just add mascara to your upper lashes only as I obviously dramatized my look more than I would for normally going out.

And voila!